You had plans in place for what your goals are in life and how you’re going to achieve them. There were various (albeit complicated) reasons I did this, but some of them aren’t so obvious. You see, I’m a man, and I’m not afraid to admit that I have acted distant in the past to women that I genuinely liked. Even when you’re in a loving, committed, and healthy relationship, sometimes you just need a break. Yes, you’re in a relationship but while your partner is — and should be — the center of your world, your world shouldn’t revolve entirely around them. One of the main reasons men pull away is a lack of testosterone.
So, it’s really a situation where we like to watch conflict play out for others but not for ourselves. But as is so often the case the reality didn’t quite meet the expectations. What I had built up in my head as this great love affair began to stagnate as I noticed some alarming red flags. Those with an avoidant attachment style are extremely independent, self-directed, and often uncomfortable with intimacy.
Exactly Why Guys Start Acting Distant All Of A Sudden (And What To Do About It)
When a man loses his confidence, he usually withdraws himself from people around him. Men might act tough, but there are times when they doubt themselves, too. Perhaps he is having low self-esteem or does not believe in himself anymore. More often than not, this happens when something physically changed or when they haven’t performed well at something they’re usually good at. If you’re dealing with a situation that’s got you at your wit’s end, rest assured that things will improve and that you are not at fault for someone else’s poor decisions. And now, let’s switch to the worst possible scenario and conclude this list of reasons guys act interested but then disappear.
This is the most common reason why a guy acts distant all of a sudden. He might be stressed because of his family, studies, work, or friends. During this situation, it is important for you to acknowledge that men and women handle stress differently.
How Do Guys Act When They Pull Away?
This situation is so common, that I always make sure my coaching clients know how to deal with it. In most cases you can prevent it in the early stages, by setting the pace of the relationship. In this case, he can’t pinpoint why he doesn’t feel like himself.
With guidance from several relationship experts, I’ve explored some common “shitty scenarios” that relationships endure, as well as some valuable takeaways that can help us work through them. For instance, years ago, I was apart from my then-boyfriend for a few months when I took a job out of town for a few months. We decided to keep dating and all was great… until he started missing more and more phone dates, or calling me later and later versus at our scheduled “date” times. He’d gone to dinner with an ex (who happened to live in his apartment building!) and I bet you can guess what he did after dinner… and it did not involve me.
If you’re not talking about anything that feels significant, that might be a red flag that they don’t really care to get to know you better. “When people really care for you, they want to get to know you on a deeper level, which also fosters connection,” says Leckie. However, if your almost-partner shuts down the convo every time you try to steer it in a deeper direction, that could be their way of telling you they’re fine with things the way they are. He may also be scared to lose the freedom he’s always had before a partner came into his life. Besides, some men want to “test the waters” and date as many people as possible before settling down with a particular one.
If he’s been out there working hard to provide for himself and his family, then he’s probably not ready for a serious relationship. It’s not that they don’t want to be in a relationship; it’s that they don’t know how to handle the situation. Whatever the reason, it’s good to give him some space and let him come back when he’s ready. Whatever the reason, ignoring a guy should give you the answers you need. His reaction will tell you everything about how he’s really feeling and what he wants from you.
You probably want to get down to business as soon as possible. If a man sees that your needs are different, he will become distant even if he knows he likes you. Consider this a favor, as some men will date you only to break JoyClub create an account your heart later. But you’ve also kept your options open – so you can move on and find a guy who’s excited and lit up inside because he gets to date you. It’s disappointing to be sure, especially if you really liked him.
I promise that waiting and not contacting her will be more painful than anything else you’ve experienced. It’s so tempting to try to contact her just one more time… but doing so won’t help your case. Immediately stop all contact with her – and make a conscious effort to set dates with other women. Texting her, calling her and drowning her with messages will only confirm her suspicions that you really are that desperate, needy guy she thought you were.
A person who wants to date you seriously will not hesitate to tell you once you’ve directly asked them about it. That’s truly the only way you’re going to get a definitive answer. There’s ‘nice’ but then there’s flirting, acting differently with you than with everyone else etc..
You might be tempted to push him into telling you what’s wrong, but don’t. Whether or not your relationship is actually in trouble, you shouldn’t make a big fuss about it, especially since the problem might not have anything to do with you or your relationship. Nato is a writer and a researcher with an academic background in psychology. She investigates self-compassion, emotional intelligence, psychological well-being, and the ways people make decisions. Writing about recent trends in the movie industry is her other hobby, alongside music, art, culture, and social influences. She dreams to create an uplifting documentary one day, inspired by her experiences with strangers.
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